finishing the race

With only one more measly little test standing between me and M4, I thought I'd take a few moments and reflect back on the year. This year has probably been one the most amazing, interesting, and fun year of my life. For years I've "wanted to be a doctor" but now I'm actually living it. Sometimes it's not all it's cracked up to be. But most of the time, it is.

OB/Gyn: Young, young moms. Feeling like I should have 4 kids by now. Funny names: Tisamiracle, Fairy, you name it. Catching a couple babes myself - they're so slippery! Lots of bodily fluids. Practicando espanol todos los dias. Gyn-onc surgeries: boring boring boring. Big women, big tumors. Sweet residents, but babycatching is not on my to-do list anymore.

Family Med: Little mix of everything. Clinic hours and lots of free time. Variety of residents. Do I want to do this when I grow up? Maybe, maybe not. Derm and sports injury procedures. Prevention. "Touchy feely" stuff and disparities in healthcare.

Peds: Cute kiddos. Bardstown with grandma and grandpa, running, making them dinner and eating bacon. Learning so much about pediatric medicine and about Dora the Explorer. Don't forget Hannah Montana - the most popular halloween costume. Well child checks over and over and over. Sick kids in the hospital get better, get toys, and go home. Kids aren't drinking, smoking, and eating themselves to death. Kind, gentle residents. Maybe I want to do this, kids are so cute. Or will I get sick of well-children? Should I specialize?

ER: Busy. Life-threatening. Minute-to-minute. Algorithms and ACLS. Teamwork. Shiftwork. Too high-stress and boring at the same time. Fun to watch, lots of stories.

Medicine: A little of everything. My first dying patient - liver failure from alcohol. MRSA endophthalmitis, hospital-acquired infections, kidney failure. Managing disease states as well as preventing them. Women's clinic felt like a treat each week. VA old men and their stories - they love it when you smile. So much to learn, I will never know it all. Maybe I can try. Now this might be what I want to do.

Psych: Consult service. Addicts are people too, and sweet young women at that. Bipolar girl who thinks she has AIDS and talks to her dead father, then storms out on me. Depressed cutter transgender man shows me the plastic hidden in his shoe that he did not use to cut himself all week. Really talking to patients. Talking to families. Lots of talking. I want the best for them but they don't want it for themselves.

Neuro: Brainy docs, literally. Love diagnosis even without treatment. Patient who was eating Easter dinner on the back porch, walked inside and suffered a massive stroke, never to respond again. Funny words for not funny things: aphasia, hemiagnosia, etc. Curiosity and zebras.

Surgery: Dreading this all year, but suprisingly not bad. Plastics, ENT, VA. Cool residents, "doing stuff" in the OR is actually fun. Learning to sew, tie knots. Learning about what's important in trauma, and in life. Patients who say "you saved my life."


I don't really know any other way to sum up the year. It was all so overwhelming...in so many ways. I can say pretty confidently that it has been the best year of my life, which leads me to believe I have picked the right profession. I have had so many rich experiences this year and I can't believe our 3rd year has come to a close. I remember being M1/M2 and seeing those wise old M4s lounging around the hospital...now I am one of them! And this time next year, we'll all be doctors! It's sort of unreal....